Restoring my soul.

Over the past year I have been struggling with my identity.  The question of “Who am I?” keeps raising its ugly head during my quietest moments, lying in the dark when sleep won’t come.

What is it I really want to do with my life?  Reliving all those missed and ignored opportunities because the timing wasn’t right or the kid’s needed me or hubby’s needs were more important.  Any excuse or reason I could muster up that sounded somewhat socially acceptable I found it.

So imagine my surprise when a perfect opportunity came knocking on my door.  The career move of the century, one I have been dreaming about for years.

Do I open the door? Do I ignore all the naysayers? The universe has decided to drop a brick on my head this time around – no more whispers and sniffs.

The knocking grows more and more persistent and the door bell rings louder and louder.  There is a power play in my head… family or very flexible career opportunity?

Family has won the argument every time perhaps it is my turn now?  Perhaps what the Universe has in store for me will be great for my family.

As Eleanor Roosevelt said, “You can have it all, you just can’t have it all at the same time.” Well, I think I may be about to enjoy the next step in having it all.  My kids are almost all in high school, my baby is 12 years old and extremely independent.

If I’m home every night to cook dinner and take the kids to sporting events and extracurricular activities and there is time for the hubby then where’s the harm in pursuing my dream?