Restoring my soul.

The title makes it sound like there is a choice on who you will become after putting in all the work to heal from the trauma, pain and suffering. The reality is there is… You are the decision maker, at some point in your healing journey there will be moments of peace and even joy again.

You will notice your energy levels increasing and your ability for cognitive thought will get almost back to normal for you. There will be times where the things that used to trigger you will no longer have such a deep and reactive response.

The choosing comes when we notice ourselves engaging in life again. Are we going to continue to choose the negative, the pain, the darkness. Or will we choose joy, healing and the light?

Easier said than done I hear you say. True it can be difficult to train our thoughts to see the positive after a long period of time living in the darkness. However if we are mindful of our time in the moment and react to the reality of now and not the fantasy of our feelings, then we are in power of our reactions and our emotions.

How do we accomplish the recognition of now? STOP, pause, take a breath, be still. Acknowledge the fixtures around you, what can you see, what can you smell, what can you taste, what can you hear? Take notice of how your body reacts to these sensations, is it relaxed? Are your muscles tensing or staying neutral? How about your breath? Is it even and deep or quickening and shallow? How about your body temperature, are you sweating or heating up? Do you feel comfortable in your skin?

All of these are indicators of safety, by openly acknowledging that you are in a safe place your brain will automatically start to recognise the situation at other times and calm the fear cycle that causes fight, flight or freeze responses. We have talked about our Amydgala before and how it’s only job is to keep us safe from Sabre tooth tigers, the trick is to feel these feelings for a couple of minutes before reacting and assess the situation in its reality, therefore changing your neural pathways and natural thought processes to lean toward the positive.

So in a way you do choose the person you will be, by recognising and acknowledging the reality of the in the now situation and choosing not to react at the first instance of any feeling that pops into your head. It will make interactions with the other humans in you life much less fraught with danger and a whole lot more enjoyable and peaceful.