Restoring my soul.

Here we are approaching the end of yet another year and hasn’t 2016 been a beauty?

130 celebrities from my childhood and my adolescence are  gone forever, for some this has been a saddening and sobering realisation, for me it seems that it is the natural cycle of life.  Some of these have died early in their lives and some lived to ripe old age.  Yet what most have in common is a life of over indulgence and excessive activity,some abused recreational drugs and others worked themselves into the ground (which is still a dopamine producing drug).

The realisation that abusing our bodies, our minds and our thoughts will be detrimental to our longevity, here in lies the example of such reality.

Now I’ve never done recreational drugs, I hardly ever smoked (I tried it but never really understood the attraction so I quit).  I drink occasionally, I used to drink a whole lot more. I don’t think my life will be ended by over excessive behaviours in these areas.

My “drug” is people pleasing, putting everyone first before myself.  Yes at times I toyed with “me first” but I was left feeling empty and sad and I also lost a lot of “friends” who miraculously when I was in people pleasing mode again suddenly reappeared.  This strikes me as funny.  I get a good feeling when I help people, when people come to me for advice and I’m able to help in some small way.  This has not come without it’s consequences, I became burnt out, I had nothing left for myself or my family and I let them know about it. 2016 has been a rough year in teaching lessons of self.

I tried to start a home based business which worked in spits and spurts but really didn’t do much profit ways, although the process taught me to be self reliant and resilient in times of struggle and stress.  I found I’m an all in or an all out type of person, I can’t be half and half.

I continued my University studies in Journalism and Creative Writing, I paused my studies in business management/leadership (to start again in 2017).  I even continued coaching an under 14 boys basketball team, which I love. It’s challenging and the boys are teaching me a lot about myself and who I am as a person.

This year I made new friends – some who became parts of my extended family.  I had to let go of some people who were sucking me dry.  I still have some decisions to make in this area.

My family had some highs and lows in 2016, my eldest graduated from High School and is about to embark on his tertiary education.  My daughter at age 14 discovered herself and her passion for basketball and work and found a group of friends that believe in her and lift her up. My youngest at 13 made it through his first year of secondary school, suffering anxiety disorder and being on the ASD spectrum made 2016 a struggle for us all.  I am so super proud of all of them.

2016 was hard, it was fun, it was challenging, it had it’s highs and lows but with every ebb and flow a lesson was taught and learned.  I hope for all of us that 2017 has more highs than lows, but doesn’t skimp on the lessons.

Happy New Year all.